Practical things to think about
Making a will
Putting your affairs in order
Lasting power of attorney (LPA)
Living Will
What to do at the time of death
Arranging the funeral
Life after the death of a loved one
Practical issues can be the last subject you want to consider at the end of a life. However, many people find it easier to cope at this time knowing family and friends do not have the responsibility of making major decisions. The issues you may choose to think about in advance are:
By making a will you can decide what happens to your property and possessions. You can draw up a will yourself, but it is best to get legal help because there are certain rules to follow when writing the document. You can contact your local Citizens Advice Bureau for a list of solicitors who can help by either writing the will for you, or checking a will you have written.
Before making your will, it’s important to think about:
- what money, possessions and property you have – this is known as your estate.
- who you want to give your estate to
- who you want to take care of any children who are under 18
- if you have any wishes regarding your burial or cremation
- who you want to carry out your wishes and sort out your estate – this person is known as the ‘executor’ of the will.
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It can be helpful to let your family know where they
can find:
your financial details such as your bank, building society, credit card and pension details
important documents such as your passport, insurance details and house deeds
details of your gas, water, electricity suppliers and anyone you have hire or credit agreements with
details of you last wishes and any pre-paid funeral plans.
Towards the end of life you may become unable to make decisions about your financial affairs or welfare. An LPA allows you to stay in control of the situation by choosing a person to make these decisions for you. You can set up an LPA as long as you can show you understand and approve of what is involved.
This document is used to show what medical treatment you would like to receive if you become unable to make decisions. For example, you can leave instructions about whether you want to be resuscitated if your heart stops, receive artificial ventilation in intensive care or whether to donate an organ after death. For advice in these matters it is worth seeking the expertise of a solicitor.
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If death occurs in hospital, care home or hospice, the staff will let your family know what they need to do. If death occurs at home then your family must inform your general practitioner and contact the funeral director.
Deaths due to industrial diseases, including Mesothelioma must be referred by the GP or hospital to the HM Coroner. He/she will decide whether a post mortem examination is required and will hold an inquest in to the death. Only then can a death certificate be issued. For more information on this call the British Lung Foundation Helpline on 08458 50 50 20.
Otherwise, a useful booklet ‘What to do after a death’ is produced by the Department of Work and Pensions
Arranging a funeral, either for yourself or a loved one, may be upsetting, but some people find it plays an important role in adjusting to the end of life. Some people have already had thoughts about how they want their funeral to be – if so don’t be afraid to write them down or let someone know what is important.
If you are arranging the funeral, the important thing is to think about what kind of funeral you want. There are a range of options available to you including religious and non-religious ceremonies. Speak to the funeral director - they will guide you through the practical and legal arrangements for the funeral. Some people may have already taken out a pre-paid funeral plan, or may be entitled to a ‘funeral payment’ from the Department of Work and Pensions.
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It is normal to have a variety of emotions after death – there is no time scale for what you should feel and when. You may find that you have strong emotions immediately after death of a loved one, but many people do not experience these emotions until much later on. Some people feel ‘anticipatory grieving’ where they have strong feelings such as loss and grief before the end of life.
You may want to share your feelings with family and friends, but equally, you may not feel comfortable doing this. Some people find it easy to talk to a particular person – don’t be afraid to let them know how you feel.
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Last medically reviewed: March 2011
